Friday, November 12, 2010

Education and activism

I never saw myself as the activist type. One of those people that care so much about an issue that it consumes them to the point where they toss red paint on people wearing fur, picket outside doctors offices, riot at G8 summits, drive tiny little boats in front of whaling ships, or in anyway think tea bagging was political outside frat party politics, yet I seem to be becoming more and more politically active here at MSU. I guess what consumes me is that the life I lead has just so much ignorance surrounding it, that even when people take the time to consider trans issues they only know stereotypes and hateful propaganda. Even when organizations do talk about LGBT issues for tolerance reasons, there is just so many trans type things no one talks about. Oh surgeries and the process of changing from one gender to another, yeah people will talk about that, but the actual lives and experiences of trans people ...... there is just this empty void in the dialogue.
With this in mind I guess my activism is an educational one, where I share my lived experience with others, where I put a face and person next to the category. I began involvement with the MSU LGBT panel discussion group. Basically, when a class, residence hall, organization, or business wants to talk about gay stuff they put in a request and 3-4 people show up to talk about issues and experiences LGBT people have faced. I did my first panel this last Wednesday, and was fairly nervous, not in the answering of their questions, I have done that for lots of people lots of times, but in being the face for an entire group of people not often interacted with by the straight community.
Sure I'm a transgendered bisexual girl, but I wonder if I can really capture and pass on the all the drama, good and bad, that it means to have those labels. I tell myself that if I don't do it then more people will remain ignorant, but I fear that any misstep on my part, any testimony that is unique to me and not transpeople in general, will be what gets associated with all transfolk for the people I talk to. I never really saw myself as an activist, but with so much misinformation out there, even if I stumble it is probably better than nothing at all.
So, as i walked away from my first panel group, I smiled to myself, and hope that in some small way I can make a difference in the world, so that someday I can be an equal citizen in this country that I love, that I am a Veteran of her military to protect freedoms that I currently don't have, that people can see and understand a little bit better why all of us gets to live our lives how we see fit. I don't think I will be tossing paint anytime soon though.

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